I’m writing to apologize, and to say that I’m so happy we’ve found that spark again.
I know it’s been a journey. And I’m glad you’ve stuck by me, even when it probably seemed like I was abandoning you. I like to think that you’re wiser than I am and that you always knew we’d reconcile. And I’m sorry to relate that there were times I contemplated removing you from my profiles and bios because keeping your name there as part of what identifies me felt like it was becoming a lie. Continue reading
Tips for travelling in threes – in Iceland and otherwise
We travelled to Iceland for eight days this April, just the three of us adults. Finding accommodations was complicated slightly by the fact that there were three of us, but for the most part didn’t pose any major issues. Continue reading
I’ve used DailyMile to track my runs since I started running in 2009. I started with the Couch to 5K program (also available in a great app) and had DailyMile recommended to me by the same friends who had recommended that. For years, it was just a website. For the first year or two, I would log on when I got home, plot my run on the map and find out how far I had gone. The mystery! Now it sounds a bit absurd (oh how quickly we adapt), but at the time it was great. I was just thankful the map was so accurate.
Then, I got a newer phone. I searched for a DailyMile app to no avail. Continue reading
Yes, this is exciting!
Fine, it’s by my own choosing. I was finding myself looking up birds that I saw, especially if they kept popping up in my life, if I felt a special affinity with them, or they were uncommon and I spotted them unexpectedly. I mean really, I do the same thing with animals (if I see a moose or fox or something else a bit elusive). However I get to see birds more often, so I’m looking them up more often!
So naturally (haha) I decided that the birds I see are actually spirit messengers. Continue reading
To the woman carrying her small child on her back, without the assistance of a carrier, across the 14th St. Bridge in northwest Calgary last Wednesday:
Thank you. Continue reading
The other day, Neko and I went for a walk by the (manmade) lake near our house. When we got to the point where the path was about to veer away from the lake, I asked her if she’d like to continue on the path and around the hill, or climb the hill and walk back along the top. She said she’d rather climb the hill but when I said, “Okay, we’ll go a bit further on the path and when it turns, we’ll go up the hill,” she gestured to the steep bank to our left and responded, “No, let’s climb the hill right here. It’s harder.”
She wanted to take the harder way because it would be hard work and therefore would be “better for us” in the long run. I told her it’s obvious that she’s my kid.
“Do you know what a comfort zone is?” I asked her. Continue reading
With Remembrance Day this Wednesday, I’d like to recommend a book for any parents out there looking for a story to give a bit of context to a soldier’s experience in a way a child can understand. Continue reading
I have a confession to make. Andi and I are trying this new thing, with the aim of changing our lives — being more productive, having more energy and generally feeling like we have forward momentum.
The new thing is … getting up every day at 6 am.
Everyone who is reading this and has ever met me just stopped reading right there because they know I’m lying. Continue reading
On Halloween night, I was thinking about random acts of weirdness and how they can brighten someone’s day. Of course what got me thinking about this was when I realized that using just my #sexyghost costume, I could really either freak people out or make them laugh by simply standing very still — say, under a streetlight, or in a dark corner of our yard. How much fun would it be to wear the costume around dusk and stand in the woods just off a bike path somewhere? I mean, as long as I didn’t get beat up.
This got me thinking of other random acts of weirdness — something that used to be one of my favourite hobbies. My best friend and I used to do things like rollerskate around the neighbourhood in angel wings (we were 18, not 8), and we had grand plans of setting up a fake Christmas tree in the park in the middle of May. I also like to buy flowers and hand them out to strangers, paint rocks and leave them in unexpected places, or create treasure hunts in the library for strangers. I miss doing these things! Continue reading
I’ve wanted to be in a triad for a long time. Justan and I talked years ago, in 2001 or so, about how cool it would be to have a girlfriend and all three of us live together… but that was a crazy dream, right? Over the years I dated other girls and sometimes Justan dated them with me, but we never thought that three people could fall in love! Well, then one day three of us did fall in love. That changed things.
We then went on to be polyamorous in that we dated other people, for a few years. During this time we learned a lot. We learned a lot about treating people with compassion and respect, and about how some of our early language and perceptions in polyamory had made our other loves out to be more like objects and less like… well, people. Things like veto power, and hierarchical language.
By the time I started dating Andi, I was very conscious of the way I framed my own perceptions — of her rights to speak up, ask for what she needs and wants out of a relationship, and not be second place to anyone unless *she* wants to. Continue reading